health and wellness

My whole life I have struggled with weight. I have always been the biggest in my family, my sisters are all tall and slim and I am short and fat, it’s not a put down to myself but a truth. People often look at me and wonder, how does she fit into this? Honestly, for years I thought the same thing, I would make jokes about the fact that I was the duff of the family, but truthfully it always made me feel a little alienated from the group. I am the oldest of 4 girls and I am a lot older then they are, my sister under me is 4 years younger the next is 6 and the one after her is 10 years younger than me, so there was always the age gap as well. I would sit there while they ate whatever they felt like and wish that I could too, until one day I didn’t care anymore, I started eating whatever I wanted and would say oh well this is just who I am. I would reward myself after a tough day with a trip to Tim Horton’s for a large tea and a donut, sometimes a cookie or two and chocolate was a must in my house. I was fine with it most of the time, I was always at home or work and my husband didn’t seem to mind my weight gain, but as soon as I had to leave the house I would completely meltdown. I mean crying and screaming and throwing clothes around until I would just tell my husband to go without me or call and cancel making up excuse after excuse until finally, my friends stopped calling, they stopped inviting me out and life got really boring. In April for my birthday I went out with my family and we all went back to my Mom’s house, I went to the bathroom and there on the floor like always was her dreaded scale. She always made jokes about making it say she was heavier than she really was because she can’t ever keep weight on, I knew I shouldn’t but I did anyway and I stepped on the scale. 197 LBS!!!! I was 3 lbs away from 200 and I was so unhappy, it wasn’t just my weight but how I felt, I mean I had alienated myself from my friends and family until we didn’t see anyone anymore, I bought and wore clothes that hid my fat but still when I looked in the mirror I would cry, I just hated what I had done to myself. I knew there had to be a reason I wasn’t ever able to lose weight, I had done every diet there was and it didn’t matter everything I did all the time at the gym did nothing. For my sister’s wedding, I did the 21-day fix for 2 months straight and I feel now that I was bigger after the 60 days then I was when I started. Something had to change, so I googled. I went on and wrote out everything I felt: tired, sluggish, overweight, unhappy… the list went on and up popped this Instagram feed. The woman on it was talking all about how she had turned her life around, how she started taking care of herself and eating healthy and how with the help of some supplements was living her best life. I followed her any every day for a month watched her feeds, she was constantly posting about this drink, the pink drink and how it was helping her to have energy, and helping her mood, and everything she was saying was what I was feeling, so I messaged her. I talked to her for another month back and forth because I was skeptical, I mean I had tried these crash diets before. She was amazing she was honest and said listen there isn’t going to be this magic pill that you take and you lose the weight, it was gonna take work, hard work and determination but also it was going to take me wanting to make the change. wanting to look in the mirror and feel happy, and healthy and you know what, that was exactly what I needed to hear. I did it I spent the money and I started a journey, and she was right it was hard work. I spent the first couple months working my ass off in the gym and eating nothing but spinach and vegetables, but I started to see a difference! For the first time ever I saw myself changing, my energy was back, I mean I got up in the morning and felt rested, I got through the whole day without thinking about a nap, I was losing weight, fitting into my clothes better and I just feel good. Not only was this product supposed to help me lose weight it was balancing my body, but it also helped me to get rid of all the gross stuff stored in my gut and start replacing it with good foods, and it balanced my insulin which was always a borderline diabetic, it helped me feel like me again. I wake up every morning and chose me, I chose to be happy and I chose to work on myself. I write in my journal again, I go to the gym, I eat good foods, and I have the energy to play with my kids and that my friends is priceless. I’m not in any way saying that you need to go out and buy this product because it doesn’t work for everyone, but I am 100% telling you that if you want to make a difference and need a boost to help you be a better you, its a damn good place to start.

Happy Hump Day